Men
aren’t the only ones guilty of asking this above all sensitive and
inappropriate question. In fact, my experience is that women are way
more likely to embarrass themselves on this gaff than men, at least
twice as often.
The question isn’t how old are you or how much do you weigh.
The question you should never question a woman is
“are you pregnant?”
Most
people assume a pregnancy is a joyous time, something to celebrate, and
for the vast majority of expecting mothers it is. But, the question may
be borderline disrespectful and flat out rude to question; it isn’t
really any of your business.
The sensitivity of this issue cannot be overstated.
Why would a woman care if you question if she is pregnant?
For
starters, she may be pregnant and not yet ready to make her status
public. This brings up issues of how it might affect her professionally.
What if she is discriminated against?
What if
she is waiting to announce her pregnancy until she knows she has
crossed the risk threshold of 13 weeks when the incidence of miscarriage
is dramatically reduced?
What if
she just recently miscarried late-term and while struggling with her
loss, your nosey-a*s comes in and wants to know all of the intimate
details of her life?
What if
it is an unwanted pregnancy? Not to say the baby will or won’t be
wanted upon birth, but you can’t assume the pregnancy is happening below
positive terms.
What if she is just overweight and carries it all in the middle?
What if
she is struggling to conceive, has gone through rounds of hormone
therapies and has gained abdominal weight as a result of her failed
attempts?
What if
she has diastasis recti and you are making her feel like an alien
because her body didn’t “bounce back” the way it once was?
The
point is this: you should be more worried to offend a woman by asking if
she is pregnant than by not asking. Eventually, it’s none of your
business unless she wants it to be your business.
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